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Aug 27 2012

Kalil Has Been Set Free

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At 2 p.m. Kalil’s vet made the home visit to put him out of his pain and suffering.


I snuck in one last picture with my boy, right before the vet came.  I had puffy eyes from crying since yesterday, and he has a crusty nose from a nasty fall on cement earlier in the day, but you know…




It was swift and quick.  It feels like my heart is still breaking even all these hours later.


I feel particularly nasty after griping about how I thought my husband was being a butt yesterday, when today he showed me this video he had started making for Kalil last month.  He must have finalized it with the dates last night.   Yes, I feel like a total jerk.



RIP Kalil the Tripawd Wonderdog.  You  have taught me more lifelong lessons than you will ever realize.



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20 responses so far

Aug 26 2012

Breaking Point

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On Friday, Kalil was like this during a visit from Grandpa (after a few days of superdoses of Prednisone the vet prescribed to him on Tuesday):



Awesome to see, yes?


On Saturday, I woke up to this (warning:  not the most fun video to watch):



The “bloodhound eyes” (the only way I know how to describe it) have occurred off and on the last couple of days starting at breakfast on Saturday (6am).  On Tuesday, the vet said that the cancer is eating away at all of his facial muscles (or something along those lines) which means the sunkenness around the eyes is creating the eye boogers and irritation around the eyes.   He is also fully blind in his left eye which has really only occurred in the last couple of days.


My husband was out of town for an agility trial since Thursday night and returned today.  Kalil has fallen down several times yesterday and today and had a pretty bad spill this afternoon.  Kalil recovered but it took him quite some time.  My husband is in denial.  Right now, I would really like to punch my husband in the face for being so selfish, or not accepting that Kalil really isn’t well.


I probably shouldn’t even post anything today but I am tired, and upset, and stressed out.   And I hate seeing Kalil this way and not coming to an agreement with my husband that maybe Kalil is suffering and that maybe it really is time to let him be at peace.

8 responses so far

Aug 22 2012

Another Vet Appointment

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And so it goes.  After the initial burst of goodness from Prednisone, he was good for about ten-ish days or so, but after reducing it gradually (per vet instructions) I knew he was getting worse.  We also have been feeding him around 36-40 oz. of food per day for the past month or more and he can’t maintain his weight.  When Kalil was healthy, he was eating around 19-20 oz. per day, so obviously something wasn’t “right”.
The cancer is finally winning.  I mean, it had an edge for some time, but it is definitely winning now.  At 65 pounds, at twice as much food to even maintain that, he is losing the battle.  Our veterinarian, who has been Kalil’s doctor since we got him in November 2004, got tears in her eyes when I brought him in.  She didn’t see him last month when he was put on Prednisone but had seen him at his prior visit in June when he was still relatively healthy.  It’s amazing and scary how quickly things can go downhill.  And to think we haven’t even gotten to the REAL downhill part of this journey… it sucks.


So he is at the max amount of Prednisone for his body weight… again.  Our veterinarian gave him maybe a month.  We will be fortunate if he is “healthy” enough to make it to his eighth birthday but I feel that is asking a lot of him.   His spirit and willingness to please and make us happy is still strong but his body is weak.  I feel bad for my boy.

4 responses so far

Aug 01 2012

Another Vet Visit, Prednisone Prescription, NADAC Trial, and 11-month Ampuversary!

Filed under Ampuversary,NADAC

Things got kind of hairy again about a week and a half ago.  Kalil had another bad day, out of nowhere.  I was beginning to wonder if he was in a lot of pain.  I broached the subject to my husband about taking Kalil to the vet to see about pain management as I was thinking it may be close to “that time”.   Kalil seemed very pained, wasn’t excited about eating, and actually refused a meal at one point.


My husband isn’t a fan of meds, but after our vet visit on July 20th, the vet said it was time to put Kalil on prednisone… to at least try it to see if it improves his quality of life before making the final decision to put Kalil to sleep.  One of my Facebook friends, whose Boxer also had histiocytic sarcoma but wasn’t a candidate for amputation, had suggested inquiring about prednisone as it had helped her Grady have a few good quality months before his body finally gave out.   I sure am glad that we took him in.  Kalil is not only on prednisone, but he is also back on tramadol (he was on it after his amputation for a few months) – and what a HUGE change.  He is drooling for food again and dancing around, just like he used to do.  I hadn’t realized how downhill he had gotten in the few weeks before putting  him on the meds until I saw the changes after even one dose.


Of course, there are trade-offs.  The vet said that it would increase Kalil’s thirst and potty breaks and that is an understatement to say the least.  I don’t even think Kalil is drinking more than usual (he had been drinking more water but I didn’t know if that was due to the extreme heat or his liver failing) but he pees like Austin Powers several times a day.  I am fortunate that my employer allows me to take an early lunch and a second early afternoon break because I let Kalil out twice during each of those breaks and he pees like Austin Powers both times.  The first and second day of the prednisone dosing, it seemed like he was “leaking” overnight.  Now Kalil is not one to EVER want to make a mess in the house, but he leaked on our bed during the day when I was out of town and my husband was just a bit too late in being able to leave work to let Kalil out.  He had also leaked on his dog bed a couple of times overnight the first couple of days.  Since I’m trying to be all about dignity, I am now doing the 2 breaks during the day, working a half hour later, and getting up in the middle of the night to take him out.    I suppose I am a bit extreme, but I feel I owe it to him.  Maybe I’m just nuts.  (Well, I know I am, just a little…)   But he would leak and not even get out of bed.  It’s like he didn’t even know.  I just felt bad so I try to prevent it as much as I possibly can.


When we took him to the vet on the 21st, I was kind of iffy on if we would be able to do the NADAC trial the weekend of the 28th and 29th.  I had sent the entry form in early June and entered him in 2 tunnelers runs and 1 weavers run.  He claimed his second novice Weavers title on Saturday, left the tunnelers ring to see his dad and “girlfriends” on Saturday (his first “eliminated” run ever!!!!), and was .8 seconds over course time which prevented him from a Q on Sunday.


Saturday’s Weavers Run:



Saturday’s Tunnelers Run:



Sunday’s Tunnelers Run:



I am so thankful that we had a few good runs this past weekend.


Today is Kalil’s 11-month ampuversary.  Another milestone reached with my big buddy.  🙂  He spent the day relaxing and being lazy.






7 responses so far

Jul 03 2012

A Visit with the Holistic Vet, Another NADAC Trial, 10-month Ampuversary, and More Lumps

I ended up taking Kalil to a holistic vet on June 16th.  His eye has still been very red and gets worse with excitement/exercise, and it was pretty bad during the visit with Dr. Falk since he got to go somewhere new and fun where he was the life of the party!!!  She put him on stasis breaker, which could potentially “clear up” nodules and is only available through veterinary request.  She approved all the supplements I have been giving him (there are A LOT more now than when I started out) but did say the eye was a concern but that in order to get a more definite answer, I would have to take him to a doggy eye specialist in Cedar Rapids… which would mean even more $$$$.  She said he seems to be able to see with that eye though… and unfortunately we are kind of maxed out as far as what we are going to contribute to veterinary care.   After several thousand dollars, we just don’t have any more money for major testing.  Especially since we can tell that Kalil’s health is declining.  I hate to say that we’ve given up on him beating this thing.  I guess I should explain.  The last few weeks haven’t been horribly bad but we can tell that he is definitely not staying the same or better (I would gladly take maintaining, I’m not greedy!).  The eye, of course, is a major concern.   He now has two lumps on his back right leg (I was mistaken in an earlier posting) – one is in the muscle and one is near where the leg meets the torso.  They are maybe within two inches of each other.  He has the possible fatty tumor on his non-amputation side.  He has another tumor about the size of a small pea on his amputation side, rear leg where the leg meets the torso.  I found one a couple days ago on the base of his neck (hubby thinks it may be a bug bite but I don’t think so).  Then, last night, after a trying weekend, I come home to my husband saying he found another lump on Kalil’s amputation side, near his ribs.  It’s HUGE.  I have no idea why neither one of us noticed it.  It’s like they appear overnight.



I guess I have more explaining to do.  Saturday, June 30th, was Kalil’s first “bad day”.  We were scheduled to do the weavers course for NADAC  and after a good breakfast and some pittering around, I told Kalil it was time to go play.  Usually when I get my jeans on, he thinks it’s time to go.  That day, he wasn’t so enthused – very unusual.  He slept during the 10-minute ride over to the dog center – very unusual.  He didn’t want to look out the window and I could barely get him to budge from laying down – very unusual.  I walk in the dog center to find out the status of where they are at on run order and find out that they had moved the weavers run to first thing in the morning.  We missed our run.  Apparently they sent an email out, but to my husband and not me.  In his defense, there was NOTHING in the subject line that mentioned anything about changing the run order and in the several months of participating in NADAC, they have never changed the order of the runs.  So I left.  I’m glad I didn’t drag him in there but had left him in the car with the air running.  I cried, I was so upset with myself, with things.  But I was more upset that he was acting so out of character and I knew it wasn’t good.



My husband had to take care of the afternoon feeding since I went in to work in the afternoon to “catch up” – ha, never happens.  I come home to find out that Kalil didn’t want to eat his dinner.  Kalil has never refused his dinner.  NEVER in his almost eight years.  He reluctantly ate after several minutes and it took him some time.  He wasn’t very excited about it which is VERY out of character for him.  He usually dances and jumps around at the word “dinner”.  Since I was home, I got his nightly supplements ready, and he didn’t come to the kitchen gate like he usually does.  He just laid on his dog bed in the computer room.  I ended up having to spoon-feed his supplements to him – it was the only way he would eat them.  I have never had to do t hat and never thought in all my years that I would have to do that.  Things were very sad in our house that night.  We were scared that something was not right.



Luckily, that was short-lived.  After worrying all night, Kalil was eager for breakfast and then for his mid-afternoon snack of greens and yogurt.  We had our NADAC tunnelers run that day and it was like he was a whole new dog.  Very excited to get going and see his friends and play.



Kalil’s Tunnelers Run from 07/01/12



We missed a qualify by .78 seconds but I was so happy to be running with him again, especially after the day before.  I can tell his lungs are starting to hurt.  His legs are starting to hurt.  He is slowing down, which scares the crap out of me because I know he’s deteriorating.  But he loves the game so much that both vets and his chiropractor say to run him until he just can’t do it anymore.  So I do.   And I am so thankful that we can spend those thirty-forty seconds out there together.


Sunday was also a great day, not only due to his recovery from the day prior and his great agility run, but it was his 10-month ampuversary!



We have been so lucky that things have been so smooth-sailing for us.  Saturday was definitely a wake-up call that our luck may be starting to run out.  Kalil is a fighter, but he can only fight so long.  Unfortunately, I think either his tumors in his legs or the tumors in his lungs are going to end his fight for him.


I will end this post with a picture of Kalil and I after our tunnelers run on Sunday.  You can see his red eye really well in this one.  We are both pretty happy though.



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